A Question of Scarcity

I’ve blogged about this briefly – that the older men get, the more in demand they become. And it’s a somewhat perverse but true insight, that it is exactly that opposite for women.

 

I generally don’t stereotype, and I’m definitely not one to conform to everything society dictates of my female gender. But, and this is just purely from observation:

 

There are truly very few decent, eligible ‘want to marry’ bachelors out there.

 

Perhaps it’s because at this age, women are looking to settle down more. It could be partially to do with the maternal clock ticking, or just a general need to want to belong to someone and be ‘owned’ (oh god I can’t believe I just said that). Whereas men, seeing that their stocks are rising, and having all the attention they didn’t have when they were younger, are happily playing the field and taking their time. What happened to the days where the boys waited in a queue for us?! As theirs gets longer and ours shorter…I ponder -

 

If my girlfriends and I are looking for similar qualities, and we are somewhat similar as individuals, then going on a ‘hunt’ together is going to turn out to be pretty futile because we’re going to be competing for the same person.

 

It’s like as if the pool is really that small. However, I have come to the conclusion that somewhere deep inside me I believe the imperfect-perfect one is out there, looking for somebody just like me. And that would mean that would apply to all my girlfriends as well.

 

And so. In conclusion – scarcity is just in the head

The Ideal Relationship

It’s been an interesting month. I do apologize for not updating to anyone who is reading.

 

Gosh. What can I say. I’ve been there, I’ve done that. I’ve not given up on searching for that ideal relationship.

 

And. I am almost scared to say it now. But I think I’ve had a glimpse of it. I’m not sure where it’ll take me, but I know there’s something that’s different here that I’ve never quite experienced before. And I almost have to catch myself and say ‘maybe it’s because of timing,’ or ‘maybe it’s the frame of mind that I’m in.’ I can’t quite put my finger on it at the moment, but…

 

For all those who ARE waiting for that ideal relationship. I can almost safely say, don’t settle for anything other than it. I understand now what married women mean when they say they just know that it is right.

 

It’s that feeling of complete understanding without having to say very much. That both of you get each other without trying so hard. That your beliefs and your values almost mirror each other. And you are working on the same frequency that even apart, you understand each other’s needs completely. It’s almost..effortless. And you laugh so much. And you make each other laugh. And that list just gets thrown out the window because every criteria is filled and even more…everything is clicking, and connecting, and working. It’s the gut feeling saying yes, but the mind saying ‘hold on…’ And when you think of that person, you feel it in your heart, not your head.

 

I’m not the sort of person who has ever fallen head over heels, or ever felt this way. There are no expectations of where this will end, but for what it is for this moment, I’m just treasuring this feeling.

 

It’s that feeling of wanting to pinch yourself because everything you ever thought of, imagined, and hoped that you would see in a relationship begins to unfold. When you’re with that person you can almost hear an orchestra playing in the background, and your being in your senses are heightened. Yet. You are so comfortable with this person. She or he brings out something within you that you always imagined yourself to be. And you want to be a better person for them, not because they are telling you to, but because you just do. It’s almost unexplainable.

 

Okay. I’m totally getting ahead of myself. It could just be one of these silly notions in my head. Again. We’ll see.